Saturday, June 29, 2013

To market, to market

One of my favourite things about summer is the weekly Farmers' Market

Here are some of our delicious finds this morning on Main Street.

Freshly baked sourdough from The Glen Oven Tea Room. Ben's favourite!  
Our weekly organic veggie CSA from Whole Circle Farm. We went with potatoes, sweet potatoes, kohlrabi, green onion, kale, broccoli, swiss chard, spinach, and herbs. Yum! 
Nothing beats fresh, local berries. Hello, strawberries!

What are your favourite market finds?

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Well-trained

D and Dad. Also featuring Rory the Dog.
Ben recently changed D's diaper at the nursery at church, prompting one of the women there to say to me, "You've got him well-trained!"

We've run into this several times since welcoming D into our family: the varying opinions and expectations of the roles women and men play in raising kiddos.

Ben has shared with me how he has felt the unsaid assumption from others that, when I'm not available, it would be better if D was in the care of another woman rather than with him. He's a man, after all, and so baby-caring isn't in his job description. He lacks the skills; he doesn't have the right touch.

Well, we disagree.

I'm so pleased that we live in a time when men are increasingly on the front lines of child rearing. That many of the men of my generation change diapers, wipe up snotty noses or spit-up, and feed bottles. That they feel competent in caring for their child in all capacities, not just by providing financially for him or her.

Some years down the road, D will understand the love Ben shows our family by leaving the house every day to work, allowing us to have a roof over our heads and food on our plates. But for now, the way D knows his daddy loves him is through the silly songs he sings to him during those diaper changes, by playing games and feeding bottles when mom is away, and by holding and cuddling and kissing.

So, is Ben well-trained? Maybe, but certainly not by me. I suspect he received his training from his own mom and dad, who both held him, and played with him, and comforted him.

I hope D will grow up "well-trained," knowing from example that manhood and fatherhood need not shy away from the tasks sometimes assigned only to women. I hope D changes diapers and rocks his own kiddos to sleep. And I hope, by then, these contributions won't raise eyebrows or shake expectations.

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

What she'd think

A family member recently shared this photo on Facebook.

It got me thinking. What would childhood-Erin think of adult-Erin?

I think she'd be surprised that I married the librarian's son, and pleased to see that I found love and stability. I think she would relish the warmth in our home.

She'd be disappointed that I'm not fabulously wealthy. But happy that the lack of, pursuit of, or preoccupation with money does not dominate our home.

She'd likely wonder what happened to my daydreams of creating a band and learning to play multiple instruments. And why I hadn't yet achieved these goals in order to play on stage with Roger Waters. Yes, I thought this was a tangible goal at one point.

She might be frustrated that I don't have a perfect body. She was holding out hope that eventually she would grow into a "perfect" shape. Didn't happen, childhood-Erin. But she would hopefully be proud of how far I've come in accepting the body I do have, and pleased to see that I'm married to a man who actually thinks I do have the perfect shape.

What would she think of my mothering skills? She would probably wish that I would relax more.

Childhood-Erin probably envisioned a much more glamorous adult self, living a much more glamorous life. Instead, she grew up to be an ordinary woman living an ordinary life. But an ordinary life that is filled with love, gratitude, and happiness. And maybe that isn't so ordinary, after all.

Saturday, June 1, 2013

The truck that Ben built

If I were a little boy, I would definitely want to play with this: Ben's latest creation.